Poetry Session: Christmas (2012)

To listen to a recording of me reciting this poem click here.


Christmas
24/12/2012 23:42

i always feel
like a temporary person;
a fleeting, novel thing

it started out by caring-
then running from toxic
man

when i wasn’t looking
it slipped
from
my
m
i
n
d

UNEXPECTEDLY.

it latched onto me-
that silly little identity.

she was new and exciting
like Christmas morning
& tearing into presents

but the day always ended
with broken toys
& parents

she was coffee
in the evening
with a pinch of salt

a little strange
& leaves a bad taste
in your mouth

then, one foul night
a little birdy told me,
“well love,
novelty wears off…

but darling,don’t you worry;
you’ll be tossed aside
soon enough!”

and that little birdy got me thinking
with a spoonful of
misery:

perhaps,
it’s inevitable
to meet the same people
all the time

maybe,
it’s inevitable
to be a temporary person
all your life

– Emmy


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Poetry Session: metric love (2015)

metric love
30/11/2015 11:56

love is a place;
with penguin classics
& late night tv

anime with subs,
lazy cats
& songs in japanese

love is a place;
with cheap flights
& distant seas

laughing lovers,
tickle fights
& clumsy hands

love is a place;
with sensitive skin
& impassioned breeze

wrapped in sheets,
twisted limbs
& tangled feet

love is a place;
with grazed knees
& an oak tree

love is a place;
with stadium love
& emily haines

– Emmy


*If you share any of my work elsewhere, please give credit where it’s due*
This poem references songs by the Canadian band Metric and lead singer Emily Haines.

Poetry Session: wave of euphoria (2015)

wave of euphoria
26/11/2015 01:54

in these streets
it’s about high tide
waves crash into trees,
the wind is the ocean-
farewell industrial noise

i’m not where i actually am,
no not at all-
but let’s share this moment;
i think i’ll call it home

it’s free, it’s beautiful,
it’s simply euphoric,
it’s all of these things
and so much more…

tonight,
i’ve made a discovery,
can you guess what i found?

i’m alive right now,
and you’re alive too;

and i feel it,
I feel it in my bones.

– Emmy


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Manga Review: ‘Deep Love: Ayu no Monogatari’ (Spoilers)


Story Review
‘Deep Love: Ayu no Monogatari’
Rating: 4/5


“To the homeless man, Ayu must have looked like an angel-
one who radiates pure, deep love from inside.”

You know the type of story that leaves a dull ache in your chest or a lump in your throat you can’t seem to swallow? Well, ‘Deep Love: Ayu no Monogatari’ by Yoshi & Yoshii, Yuu is one of those stories. So if you ever plan on reading it, you’ve been forewarned.

While in a high school setting, I believe this manga being filed under the ‘shoujo’ genre is Deep Love - Ayo no Monogatari Chapter 1 coverpossibly a mistake, maybe ‘josei’ would be more appropriate. At least, to me, the themes and events in this manga seemed to be aimed at a more “mature” audience – perhaps a ‘Nana’ type audience.  

If there’s one word I would use to describe the story of ‘Deep Love: Ayu no Monogatari’ it would be tragic. The story of Ayu’s life is filled with so much tragedy: tragic people, tragic circumstances and tragic philosophies. However, in this world built on tragedy, the main character Ayu still manages to experience precious moments of love as she becomes more involved with the few kind people (and animal) around her. Through these moments, as short and fleeting as they are, she finds a light to fuel her desire and capacity to love and be loved. Despite the fact that almost everyone else she knows is trying to bring her down and life is only throwing great obstacles her way, she still manages to become more connected with the kindness that surrounds her. In that kindness, she finds a light to ignite her pure, deep love which she believed had already burnt out.

“Happiness? What is that? Can’t you live without it?”

What happens when someone is headed in a good direction after drowning in the mud for so long? As you immerse yourself in Ayu’s world and circumstances, you find yourself yearning for her happiness, the happiness she doesn’t seem to know of, the happiness she feels she can live without. You’re taken on a journey through Ayu’s numbed, colourless life and you watch as she learns that happiness and love are possible for her which is quite a lovely journey to follow, which is why it absolutely crushed you when you’re reminded life isn’t simple or easy. A person too used to the depths will only know how to keep their head above water for so long. A lot of the time, relapse is inevitable. 

I think the thing I found most impressive about this manga is the transition of the main characters mentality towards her life, love, people, relationships and the world. From the beginning, Ayu’s main thoughts, emotions and actions are driven by self-destruction, cynicism and worthlessness. But as the story progresses, she slowly learns that love and hope exist. You find her with a desire to live as she begins to see the value in life, others and herself. Her close-minded cynical thoughts shatter as other characters come into her life and show her there’s more to the world than misery.

ayumentality2.png

“Even in a dirty city, they’ll bloom if they try hard to.”

Whether people want to admit it or not, this manga is simply a depiction of how life is for some people. Whilst I was reading, sometimes it almost felt like Ayu was sitting there with me telling me about her life. Like she wanted to tell me that despite how shit life can be, it’s never too late to change and notice the good around us, that it’s never too late to live – even if we won’t live long.
This manga doesn’t tell a story where everything is sunshine and rainbows, or where things start out muddy but all is well in the end. It portrays a life where things never seem to go right, but if you’re willing to let yourself find a way to bloom in the dirtiest and most unfortunate places, then you’ll find moments of happiness. Even if the moment doesn’t last long, it still means something, it has worth. Ayu finds reasons to smile and reasons to cry. Both drive her to bloom and love as she finds something to protect, something to live for.

“You know Granny, there was a time where I didn’t care whether I lived or died… but…
now I don’t want to die.”

ayuanddog

– Emmy


*If you share any of my work elsewhere, please give credit where it’s due*
I don’t own any of the rights to the pictures and quotes used in this review